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Irksomes – MidWeek January 24, 2024

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Some things to keep in mind, both from a local and more global perspective, providing clarity in the chilling universe…

  1. When the toilet roll at home appears quite small, don’t hesitate… take out a new roll immediately. It’s socially responsible, and as we all know, the end is always closer than it appears. You need to get to the bottom of this one.
  2. Local restaurants never fail because they stink; they simply go away because people quietly don’t come back. We don’t often read horrible reviews of food places that don’t pass muster (or mustard), but some invariably die an unattended death. We’re too nice locally to rag on places that didn’t meet our culinary standards. We just never go back.
  3. Whilst driving locally in suburbia and the slowing driver in front of you indicates an upcoming left turn, quash that urge to pass by on the right. Far too many here believe they must lurch a little right before turning left. Not true. And thus, the three seconds you save making your bold move in passing might prove damaging.
  4. Everybody understands the leash law (or should) locally; except when it comes to “my dog”, because he/she would “never harm a soul”. Some people simply don’t trust four-legged, free-roaming animals; perhaps traumatic pasts account for those feelings. And dogs do sometimes snap; no matter what you’re your post-incident rationale might be (“she’s never done that”). Fifi may be a wonderful, loving pet and companion- but it’s not your right to allow her to roam freely in public just because you feel like it.
  5. AI (artificial intelligence) advancements are already upon and among us. AI is not COVID, but it may prove as insidious and harmful in some areas. Do your homework, question authority, probe internet “truths”, and understand that we’ve entered a new(er) world that will provide great advancements (medicine) and also chaotic, false moments. Forewarned is forearmed. When in doubt, flesh it out. Hmmm, gotta be tough(er) being a teacher as AI infiltrates…
  6. With the incredible amount of quality plate lunch locations, pot lucks, and casual office lunch extravaganzas, one local law that needs to be proposed/passed is a paper plate strength minimum. No more sagging, weak plates that enhance dripping kim chee liquid detritus to stain pants or carpets! Let’s get serious about this long-ignored state need! Weak plates are no picnic.

Think about it…

Shark Tales – MidWeek October 14, 2020

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There have been a number of shark sightings recently off of Waikiki’s Kaimana Beach. Reports indicated that sharks seen on October 3 were “not aggressive”.  Same thing on October 6. Huh? Was that meant to be reassuring, like go ahead… go tubing and thrashing because it’s OK, you won’t be perceived as chum.

The draw? There have been bait balls in the area, a term used to describe when small fish swim closely together to try and protect themselves from larger predators- like sharks. The low key reference to these beautiful, but often fearsome and fearless, creatures as “non-aggressive” relates to one’s individual perspective. To halalu baitfish (scad), this non-aggressive shark portrayal would be simply fake news. 

Humans often make their own choices in life. The mere concept of the word “shark” might give some pause before placing their torsos into the tranquil surf, adjacent to a visiting shark. Something about that dorsal fin in such close proximity could take the fun out of that planned, pleasure swim. When is a door not a door? When it’s ajar (get it- “a jar”). When is a shark not a shark? When it’s melancholy, I guess.  But if these cruising sharks became aggressive, descriptive adjectives would change to: unfriendly, hungry, lunch-seeking- or some other term of non-endearment.

And what clinically trained sharkologist rendered the definitive word for the media to anoint these reef sharks as non-aggressive? Perhaps these sharks were merely passive aggressive. Luckily, we haven’t found out over the past month of sightings, with warning signs properly posted and no unfortunate (human) incidents; no reef sharks have become “eek” sharks.

Multiple sharks feeding 25 yards offshore multiple times at the placid Sans Souci. Sans Souci is a name for the beach that goes back to 1884; it’s French for “without a care”. Well if these non-aggressive visitors keep returning, mellow as they seem, I’m just not sure that bathers will be swimming or frolicking without a care during “shark week(s)”.  

Nurse, leopard, angel, whale, thresher- there are numerous, non-aggressive shark types. In reality, fewer than 8% of the 300 shark species are a real danger to humans. Sharks worldwide kill an average of just four people (unprovoked) annually. And sharks locally can be considered an ancestor, or `aumakua. But I still think it’s best to observe these wily wonders of the water from a safe- and dry- distance.

Think about it…