(Four) Season’s Greetings! – MidWeek November 11, 2020

It might be a little bit tougher for some this year for oodles of really good reasons, but the season to give thanks is nigh upon us as we hit mid-November. And while this may be a holiday season unlike any other in memory, our calendars dictate that special times are right around the corner. I’ve often pondered why we can’t just be nicer 12-months a year, instead of at Thanksgiving and Christmas time. Do we really need a calendar to tell us to treat people more kindly, or be more cheerful and thankful? After all, if we do it now, can’t we do it later, too?

Are those human traits such a stretch that we can’t take the wonderfulness of this season and stretch it out? Stores hold “Christmas in June” sales, so why can’t more people celebrate with Christmas attitudes that last beyond this 45-day window through News Year’s Day? Of course we can. We can ratchet our empathy levels up a notch regularly. We can sincerely thank people for the things they do and the things they mean to us more regularly.

Praising people you work with, jog with, or live with need not be exclusive November and December events. April’s a great month to be more consciously competent. July’s a hot time to give someone a gift card. October’s a cool month to be more aware of friends, family, co-workers, and neighbors. With some people, it almost feels forced when they turn on the charm for just a month or so around winter holidays. But, at least we know they’ve got it in ‘em!

And by the way, if eggnog is so good (which it is) why don’t we drink it year round? It’s kinda like the occasional McRib tease- only showing up on rare occasions. Why? And can’t we stuff turkeys and slather on the cranberry sauce in February? I’m pretty sure there’s no local ordinance against that endeavor. Let’s become creatures of helping, and not so much creatures of habit. Eat, drink, and be merry whenever. And let’s also pile on the sincere caring, volunteering, donating, giving, and listening so badly needed 12-months a year.  Yeh, it’s been a tough 2020. But let’s not Scrooge it up by losing sight of our faith in humanity, ourselves, and the reality that we will get to the other side of this debacle.

Think about it…

Shifting Gears – MidWeek November 4, 2020

A cohort of mine once philosophized: “don’t worry about things over which you have no control”. A simple adage perhaps, but also quite profound. For how many nights of sleep have we all lost pondering COVID-19-related situations that might adversely affect us, but over which we felt we had little, direct control?

It’s easy to say these words but oh, so hard to live up to them. There is empirical truth in the concept, especially as we all deal with our own versions of the pandemic blues in month #9. Rather than dwell on worst-case scenarios, find a plausible reality you can influence and deal with. Rather than contemplate the “what ifs”, start problem-solving (if you haven’t already). Yeh, the coronavirus conundrum involves uncertainties, unpleasantries, and possibly some major (or minor) life changes. But better to be the planner than merely the recipient of what fate throws at you, isn’t it?

Find healthy alternatives to binge-watching, web-wasting, and texting; swerve away from over-eating or drinking. Obviously, these would’ve been healthy month #3 plans, but it’s never too late. Take a drive somewhere you wouldn’t normally go- change the scenery. Go for a walk- in a different direction. Eat kale! Explore new music, or seek out old music you never dove into. Go wild- combine walking or driving with good music. How bold! Set you mind free, even occasionally. Escape the humdrum and numbness. 

Break your routines down. Brush your teeth right after dinner, a subtle signal to your brain that you’re pau for the night (which might reduce snacking and/or cravings). Contact someone you haven’t seen in years- but don’t play 2020’s “misery loves company” game; instead, find common bonds that made this lapsed contact a one-time ally; laugh about good days as you reminisce. Re-train your brain.

We all have interwoven connections from many facets of our lives here locally. Change your outlook via a little change in your direction and attitude. While nothing will currently prevent this oppressive, viral moment from being a monotonous drag and drain, you DO control your outlook, demeanor, and valuation of all people and all things. Give yourself a break, for you surely deserve it. I wrote this a week before the long-awaited election results started to funnel in, but guess what- at the end of each and every day, you still control you. You may take charge.

Think about it…

Grounded – MidWeek October 28, 2020

Being officially quarantined for two weeks is no picnic, but often it’s the little things in life that help you get by. As we sat numb through day three, four, and then five, my akamai nephew and his equally wonderful wife dropped off small gifts with big implications. Sometimes, the seemingly insignificant can keep us grounded, hopeful, and present. Sometimes, that which seems trivial can be a perfect solution.

And so it was when they dropped off Ding Dongs and Ho Hos. Defined as “small, cylindrical, frosted, cream-filled chocolate snack cakes with a pinwheel design”, Ho Hos are so much more. A timeline that reverberates deep within my very being. After scarfing down a Mom-crafted, lunchtime sandwich in junior high school, Ho Hos were an indulgent, dessert treat. And unlike those other delightful offerings (Twinkies, Sno balls, Ding Dongs) Ho Hos came three to a pack!

Yeh, perhaps the questionable Vaseline-like texture of Ho Hos preclude their stature atop the food pyramid… but come on. There’s soul food, and then there’s food for the soul. And we can all use some nostalgic padding nowadays to help us through the hellish harshness of 2020, right!

As I ate the savory, chocolate offering, I also reflected on my 15-years of AYSO coaching, when the big deal on Saturdays was not reflecting on a win or a loss, but rather- what’s for snack?! I often opted for Ho Hos or Ding Dongs. The simple onomatopoeia when I said “Ho Hos” or “Ding Dongs” was usually enough to get my minions laughing out loud. And then I would add, “Ding Dongs… because you guys (girls) are a bunch of ding dongs!”- a sure crowd pleaser.

Whether it’s shave ice, ahi poke, gazing out at your favorite beach while reminiscing about body surfing ‘til sunset, it’s OK to immerse yourself in nostalgia and trivia; exercise the vast recesses of your now-adult mind. When I hear The Beatles’ “Yesterday” (the most covered pop song of all-time), I’m back in 4th grade, wishing Liz Nathan would pay more attention to me and less to my pals- Joey and Larry. Alas, it wasn’t to be.

We need more safe escapes today, perhaps more than ever, and you house some of them within your mind. Ho Hos take me back to gentler times- 25  or even 55 years ago- and when I return, I’m convinced that it’s really gonna be OK.

Think about it…

Riding A Hilo High – MidWeek October 21, 2020

So how cool is that? 1981 Hilo High graduate, Jennifer Doudna, recently won a coveted Nobel Prize in chemistry for her work (along with Frenchwoman Emmanuelle Charpentier) in creating what are known as “molecular scissors”, processes that allow for gene-editing which, one day, could lead to helping cure diseases and fix genetic disorders.

Far too often we overlook great achievements of local public schools and their noted graduates. Jason Scott Lee, Daniel Inouye, David Ige, Bruno Mars, Mark Takai, Daniel Inouye, George Ariyoshi, Hiram Fong, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, Tammy Duckworth, Ellison Onizuka, Willie K., Bette Midler, Patsy Mink, Sid Fernandez, Keali`i Reichel, Ben Cayetano, Russ Francis, Andy Bumatai, Bryan Clay, Kalani Pea… the local public school “well-known” list of achievers is seemingly endless. High school is not always a place that provides a catalyst or acts as a driver to a fulfilling and noted career, but it can help pave the way with the right teacher(s), internal drive, hard-work, and some loving encouragement at home.

Doudna went on to Pomona College and then Harvard after leaving Hilo High. In the science “small world” department this month, her Nobel win on October 7 came one day after UCLA astronomer, Andrea Ghez, was a co-winner of the Nobel Prize in physics for her work studying Milky Way black holes (no, not the chocolate bars). Much of that work over the past 25-years has been done looking through telescopes at Mauna Kea’s Keck Observatory. Imagine that- Hawai`i and two accomplished women are arguably at the center of the science universe this month! 

Adding to Doudna’s outstanding Nobel accomplishment is the fact that only five women previously had won or shared the Chemistry prize out of 184 nominees. Perhaps this year’s award given to a local, public school grad will provide a spark or some impetus to other inquisitive local minds (female or male) at an impressionable age. All it takes sometimes is a nudge, a gentle push in the right direction. The right teacher, the right mentor, the right moment. In high school, the right teacher promoted Doudna’s scientific curiosity and said she should do it, she could do it. And Doudna did it- and then some! Now, her Nobel Prize work could be the catalyst to great medical breakthroughs in the years ahead. One breakthrough (at Hilo High) leading to perhaps many more- a prize-winning story.

Think about it…

Shark Tales – MidWeek October 14, 2020

There have been a number of shark sightings recently off of Waikiki’s Kaimana Beach. Reports indicated that sharks seen on October 3 were “not aggressive”.  Same thing on October 6. Huh? Was that meant to be reassuring, like go ahead… go tubing and thrashing because it’s OK, you won’t be perceived as chum.

The draw? There have been bait balls in the area, a term used to describe when small fish swim closely together to try and protect themselves from larger predators- like sharks. The low key reference to these beautiful, but often fearsome and fearless, creatures as “non-aggressive” relates to one’s individual perspective. To halalu baitfish (scad), this non-aggressive shark portrayal would be simply fake news. 

Humans often make their own choices in life. The mere concept of the word “shark” might give some pause before placing their torsos into the tranquil surf, adjacent to a visiting shark. Something about that dorsal fin in such close proximity could take the fun out of that planned, pleasure swim. When is a door not a door? When it’s ajar (get it- “a jar”). When is a shark not a shark? When it’s melancholy, I guess.  But if these cruising sharks became aggressive, descriptive adjectives would change to: unfriendly, hungry, lunch-seeking- or some other term of non-endearment.

And what clinically trained sharkologist rendered the definitive word for the media to anoint these reef sharks as non-aggressive? Perhaps these sharks were merely passive aggressive. Luckily, we haven’t found out over the past month of sightings, with warning signs properly posted and no unfortunate (human) incidents; no reef sharks have become “eek” sharks.

Multiple sharks feeding 25 yards offshore multiple times at the placid Sans Souci. Sans Souci is a name for the beach that goes back to 1884; it’s French for “without a care”. Well if these non-aggressive visitors keep returning, mellow as they seem, I’m just not sure that bathers will be swimming or frolicking without a care during “shark week(s)”.  

Nurse, leopard, angel, whale, thresher- there are numerous, non-aggressive shark types. In reality, fewer than 8% of the 300 shark species are a real danger to humans. Sharks worldwide kill an average of just four people (unprovoked) annually. And sharks locally can be considered an ancestor, or `aumakua. But I still think it’s best to observe these wily wonders of the water from a safe- and dry- distance.

Think about it…

What We Want – MidWeek October 7, 2020

This column is not about the post-COVID-19 dreams; it’s not about politics or red, blue or purple states; it’s not about how naïve or radical “they” are. It’s a simple tale about partnership. A study was conducted a year ago by researcher Andrew Thomas of Swansea University in Wales whereby 2,700 college students from Western nations (Australia, Norway, United Kingdom) and Eastern countries (Singapore, Malaysia) were queried about what, exactly, they were looking for in a mate for life, otherwise known as pair-bonding.

It’s estimated that only 5% of mammals mate for life, as humankind is grouped in a small cluster with beavers, wolves, and even some bats, to name a few of our bonding brethren. You undoubtedly have your own list of life partner priorities, but according to psychology lecturer Thomas, the #1 priority for men and women, East and West, is kindness. 

Seems reasonable… after all, 45+ years to be spent with someone (ideally) requires work, and having a shared appreciation for kindness can work wonders, especially during those tough times. After kindness, men favored physical attractiveness while women chose a man’s propensity to be able to provide financially. But kindness was easily the #1 requisite trait, far more important than other attributes mentioned in the study like creativity, religiosity, chastity, desire for children, and humor. Amazingly, one’s air guitar prowess did not make the “most wanted” list. Huh? While there are surely nuances based on cultural differences, at the end of the day we all want to hang out with someone who’s kind- friendly, generous, warm, decent, understanding, accommodating, compassionate, and present. 

Researcher Thomas commented that “…it’s great that kindness is king and appears to be a human universal”. Ah, if only we saw more of that in the world in general today. The lack of every day kindness around us goes beyond looking for our eternal soulmate. But let’s not venture down that dark, partisan wormhole this week. We’ve all earned a column this week bereft of political partisanship, paranoia, patronizing provocation, and the petty polarization of America. And now, back to kindness…

Kindness assumes a sense of empathy, a trait lacking far too often in opinionated conversation these days. Forget whether or not it’s about mate-seeking, sincere kindness can make even bitter indignation or disappoint a bit easier to tolerate. Kindness- a simple concept with major repercussions. Try it on…

Think about it…

The New Reality – MidWeek September 30, 2020

Slowly peeling back necessary restrictions is not going to save many local businesses hammered by the reality of seven months (so far) of COVID-19, plus quarantine, consumer wariness and weariness, costly safety measures, restrictive seating measures, minimal desire soon for large crowds at events, and sensible store traffic limitations.

We will not see local consumers rushing back to stores, malls, or restaurants soon. We will not see 10.4 million tourists visiting in 2021 or 2022. Estimates suggest that it could take five years, if we really want and get to that 2019 visitor count number again. What we need is creative collaboration, perhaps even unimaginable tax incentives and other lures to bring new business to Hawai`i. Hotels and tourist destinations will surely offer incentives soon. But how about local government working with the private sector to hopefully entice new business in the foreseeable future? Venture capital money is looking for opportunities, interest rates are low; now is the time to be entrepreneurial.

Some questioned metropolitan areas as they did backflips to convince Amazon to build its new headquarters (HQ2) in their towns. 238 cities bid, offering free land, community control, and property tax deferrals. One site purportedly offered to give Amazon employee’s state income taxes right back to Amazon! Crazy? Perhaps, but we are moving beyond “rainy day” options here as we look ahead six or 12 months. Rainy days? Prognostications indicate ground saturation and flooding. 

We need more higher-paying jobs and truly affordable housing for residents than we’ve seen over the past decade. Lots of talk for years, but little action. Tourism has been our gravy train; it’s now off the tracks. Unlike New Jersey, which offered Amazon about $7 billion to bring HQ2 there, we’re not looking to add residents, we’re just trying to keep residents from leaving in the coming years. 

Our exceedingly high cost of living and lack of quality jobs won’t permit a future of business as usual, and a vaccine won’t resolve our ongoing problems. In January, 2020, Aloha United Way (my employer) revealed that we had almost 200,000 Asset Limited, Income Constrained, Employed (ALICE) families in Hawai`i, a number also identified in AUW’s 2018 data. That was local reality pre-COVID-19. So let’s procure an East/West medical partnership, international space exploration facility, military adjunct, cybersecurity hub, science/technology expansion, ecotourism, media production facility, and/or alternate energy facilities? Or should we just wait?

Think about it… 

If Only It Was A Dream – MidWeek September 23, 2020

You wake up and hope that maybe it’s all been just a bad dream, that this COVID-19 thing is really just “Groundhog Day 2”. But then reality seeps in; you start your daily routine, whatever day or month it is. Perhaps some forces working against each other here might actually help some people with a little balance in the long run- anxiety vs. sleep. 

Hawai’i adults have the 3rd lowest percentage of frequent mental distress of any state, yet we get the least amount of sleep of any state in the country; and that was pre-coronavirus. Hawai’i ranked 50th out of 50 states in adults getting sufficient sleep (defined as at least seven hours nightly) in studies from 2016 and last year. 

One rationalization for Hawai`i’s lack of sleep is the large number of people working multiple jobs and/or longer hours to make ends meet, which decreases the probability of getting those requisite seven hours of sleep daily. Poverty also plays a role, but our state’s poverty rate (11%) actually ranks us as the 7th lowest state in terms of poverty.

But what happens now when people spend months at home; when daily routines completely change; when four people in a household Zoom all day; when jobs are interrupted or lost amid a weak economy? Are people nowadays sleeping better because they’re home more, or are unplanned stresses causing mental distress locally to creep above the 14.7% adult national average? More people with more time to ponder what’s next or what’s to be when this virus thing finally tapers off.

Sleeplessness, restless sleep, and lack of sleep affect attentiveness (driving, general cognition, etc.) and increase one’s chances for obesity, diabetes, high blood pressure, strokes, and heart disease. Quality sleep is a necessity, not a luxury, but many here find sleep to be just one more chore crammed into an already busy day.

Perhaps local medical leaders are analyzing 2020 statistics related to stress, despair, anxiety, sleeplessness, suicide ideation, and other coronavirus-related developments. More action to educate and suggest preventive treatments must take place in the trying months ahead. Losing sleep debilitates and affects work output, emotional resilience, and general attitude. Sleep, and lack thereof, must be an integral part of our larger discussion today about COVID-19 and Hawai`i’s collective mental health. Everyone’s tired of the novel coronavirus; but it’s even worse when everyone’s simply tired.

Think about it…

True Facts, Maybe – MidWeek September 16, 2020

Those daily updates on the number of local COVID-19 cases are inaccurate. They represent official numbers- confirmed coronavirus cases. The Center of Disease Control (CDC), local medical prognosticators, and foreign studies indicate that the actual number of daily cases might be five to ten times greater than the daily confirmed and reported caseload. So if 220 cases here daily doesn’t cause you any concern, would you pay attention with 1,000 or 2,000 daily cases? Asymptomatic people (perhaps 80% of the cases) are less likely to get tested (since they feel OK) but can be so-called “super-spreaders”, so this invisible game of tag goes on. Estimates suggest that 20% of COVID-19 carriers are responsible for 80% of local virus transmissions. 

We will probably have the vaccines available by year end, but they might be just 50% effective. Flu vaccines annually are only about 50-60% effective. Yet even partially effective vaccines can mitigate virus impacts. Many people simply won’t get a vaccine… ever. Only 45% of Americans get the annual flu vaccine. And the people who do get a COVID-19 vaccine, do you think they’ll then assume they’ve acquired super-immunity status, and thus no longer adhere to rules about mask-wearing and social distancing? Not a smart idea. Plus, who knows how long any new vaccine’s effectiveness will last? Smallpox, polio, and measles vaccines provide long-lasting staying power. But only time will tell the efficacy of a single COVID-19 vaccination and if possible virus mutations down the road might necessitate annual vaccines.

We obviously need to do a better job here quarantining confirmed patients. Sending a pre-symptomatic or asymptomatic coronavirus patient home where others live is a possible ticking time bomb. Good luck segregating completely in Hawai`i with so many postage stamp-sized units, multiple generations in single houses, and neighbors living so close by that you not only hear them, but you can identify the song they’re singing in the shower.

The reality is- we’re tired. Many locally have done their best to isolate and do it all- working, parenting, providing, Zooming, creating- and they’re ready to come out and play. But don’t. COVID-19 is an insidious insider, takes no vacations, mandates no time off, and doesn’t sleep at night. Stay connected digitally, but don’t let your guard down. The “he’s a good guy”/“she’s probably safe” logic is problematic and underestimates how surreptitious this invisible droplet villain really is.

Think about it…

Can Do – MidWeek September 9, 2020

You might be running out of creative things to do while quarantining for the better part of six months, but there are things you can do that will actually make a difference during this whole nightmare. Two years from now, looking back at this “lost year” of 2020, will you say that you simply made it through, or will you say that you made a difference?

Plenty of non-profit agencies could use your help beyond a cash donation. And there are things you can safely from your own home. For example, the Waikiki Community Center normally has all kinds of wonderful activity for kūpuna in Waikiki. Waikiki has more kūpuna, per capita than anywhere else in the state. Over 18% of our state population is over 65 and more seniors live beyond the age of 65 in Hawai`i than anywhere else in the country. Lucky you live Hawai`i, again… But elderly stuck in isolation can cause physical changes that increase chronic disease risk and premature death.

So back to the Waikiki Community Center. Hula, food preparation, chess, bingo, and dancing at the facility have been out of the question for five months now, and many of the Center’s regular patrons live alone, without nearby family to check on them or even call them regularly. Here’s where you come in. You (and/or the kids) can make encouraging cards for nā kūpuna, send them word games or crossword puzzles; you can even send gift cards so that an elderly reader can then buy a book online.

Simply click on www.waikikicommunitycenter.org, or mail your goodies to the Waikiki Community Center at 310 Paoakalani Ave, Honolulu, HI., 96815. The Center has created a Virtual Community Center to provide informative, educational, fun at-home activities, and virtual exercise sessions focused on cognitive and physical learning, but some kūpuna simply aren’t adept with digital tools, or don’t have them readily available. 

Some of the faithful at the Waikiki Community Center can’t get out to buy food or necessary medical supplies; a few have even lost their life savings due to scams. Loneliness can lead to uncertainty, vulnerability, and false trust. And that was a reality before sleaze balls oozed out of the slime as COVID-19 took hold, causing even more consternation amid isolation, separation, and loneliness. It’s all about making a difference- even if done remotely and for someone you don’t know.

Think about it…