MidWeek Column

While it’s true that college may not be for everyone, there is an argument to be made that is just might be right for anyone. While getting into a profession or training might be right for some, numerous studies indicate that life’s winding road may improve overall when one gets a diploma, including increased happiness odds. There are some serious free speech/hate speech and safety concerns on some campuses in 2024, but that’s also true far outside the hallowed halls- in the real world.

We enjoy myriad choices when shopping, choosing friends, picking life partners, deciding where to eat, etc., and college can provide fertile ground for seeding life-altering choices, as it teaches large lessons beyond the basic course load- like being reliable, independence, time-management, inter-dependence, prioritizing, enhancing self-esteem, learning resiliency, and increasing control over one’s own life- all attributes hopefully reinforced while attending post-high school institutions.

The University of Hawai`i Economic Research Organization (UHERO) recently published “A Case Study of the University of Hawai`i System”, based on a decades worth of administrative statistics. The information, corroborated in numerous other studies, concludes that college grads earn substantially more money over their lifetimes than those who do not graduate (or attend) college.

Of course, happiness is not defined through money; it’s a personal sense, and ultimately decisions about pursuing a college path must consider family situations, costs, health, and other individual items, but college has the potential to provide the impetus for career/life paths going forward. Options…

The price tag at too many schools is far beyond many people’s reach. An ever-present debt cloud hanging over one’s working head for 20+ years (post-graduation) is understandably a deterrent, but between scholarships, grants, community college, online courses, work savings, and other opportunities, continuing one’s education may provide the best chances for finding a career of professional fulfillment (rather than simply working “a job”) and maybe even enhance one’s ability to stash valuable retirement funds away for 45-years down the line.  

As teens research tomorrow’s career opportunities and their abilities to adapt to morphing business needs, ups and downs, roadblocks, and the other barriers that affect work, UHERO’s report provides more evidence that post-high school studies can make for greater enjoyment over the next 50-years, especially when one lives in America’s most expensive state. Attending college provides academic/career options, independence, maturation opportunities, and social lessons that simply cannot be gleaned via textbooks.

Think about it… 

Last year, there were seven (yes, seven) bills in play related to controlling O`ahu’s feral chicken population. Two bills that have rolled over into this year’s legislature propose a chicken complaint hotline… a phone number for people to call and squawk. That’s a real (chicken) nugget. Efforts to provide tainted feed to sterilize marauding cluckers were problematic, as the wild wanderers don’t hang around long enough to be contained and contaminated; they’re foragers. Plus, tossing infertility-laced feed is problematic for other animals.

Hmmm. what qualifies someone to professionally handle chicken complaints? Is there a pecking order? Traps are expensive, as are any removal suggestions, since freedom-seeking chickens apparently don’t want to comply. One concept- capture the bothersome birds and feed them to those in need- sounds interesting, but establishing a pleasant pheasant food facility is a logistical quagmire and a costly plan. California is trying rural relocation for city-dwelling chickens.

Unwieldy, expensive traps, persistent birth control feed, and coordinated culinary round-ups are not doing the job or not happening. With history as our guide, local legislators may cackle about bill specifics in committee, a few feathers will fly, and then we’ll be probably be back dissecting this issue in 2026. 

The amiable, ancient philosopher, Yoda, said, “Do or do not. There is no try”. Except locally, where repeated attempts to get things done on perennial issues often wither with minimal resistance, invariably fading away ‘til next year, while elected officials suggest “we tried…” as they somehow hack their way through a mind-boggling 3,000+ proposed bills and the now-annual, last-sessions chaos. 

Hawai`i legislators are rarely challenged in primary or general elections, so why rock the boat, create possible controversy, or chill feral chickens by making potentially provocative decisions? Our citizenry has been told to not feed wild chickens… will that prevent hungry hens from finding food elsewhere? As we now consider a cuckoo complaint line, what would this Office of Chicken Complaints actually do, besides relay concerns to higher-ranking administrators? Rampant, rambunctious chickens have been a local nuisance for years, much like illegal fireworks- and how’s that one going? Phone calls are probably not the answer. 

Who rules this roost? Wild chickens mean unwanted, pre-dawn, wake up calls, can ruin yards, spread disease, and cause genuine road havoc. I don’t mean to sound like a bad egg here, but how about measurable action plans with a budget? Enough fowl play!

Think about it…

Hawai’i’s state legislative session begins this week as the annual scramble unfolds with an estimated 3,000 proposed bills to be vetted, discussed, researched, heard, voted on, and/or quietly put aside in 60 bewildering, working legislative days. On average, maybe 10% of the bills will be passed on for the governor to sign (or veto) by mid-July.

You might assume that Hawai`i is America’s most partisan state; if you look back over the past 33-years, Hawai`i does lead all states in years in which it’s had a blue “trifecta”, as it’s called- where one political party rules the House, Senate, and sits in the governor’s office. Only the eight-year Linda Lingle Republican reign in the governor’s chair interrupted the Aloha State from having 33-years of a single (Democratic) party in charge in all three places.

Yet other states easily top Hawai`i’s single party dominance in any year since 1992. Utah has been Republican red (governor + both legislative bodies) for all of those 33 years. South Dakota (31), North Dakota (30), Idaho (30), Ohio (26), and Nebraska (26) also rank above Hawai`i in single party rule since 1992; all have been Republican red.

Maryland (21) and California (19) rank behind Hawai`i as true blue (Democratic) trifecta states often over the past 33 years, while other red-heads include Florida (25 years), Arizona, South Carolina, Texas, Wyoming (each with 22 years of one-party domination), and also Georgia (21).

Presidential political pundits quadrennially assess which way 85% of the country will vote before we mail in our ballots or wake up to vote on Election Day. In the all-or-nothing presidential stakes, a statewide 51% vs. 49% presidential outcome means the same as a 65% to 35% “runaway”, since 48 of 50 states award the winning candidate 100% of its electoral votes. The color purple be damned, it seems. 

Only Nebraska and Maine split electoral votes based on the percentage of votes earned by a presidential candidate. Interestingly, Nebraska is the only state with a unicameral system- one legislative body (since 1937). Many states have explored unicameralism, including Hawai`i, but no one’s joined Nebraska’s single legislative reality in 87 years now.

Anyway, let the legislative labor begin! Here’s hoping for answers and solutions to age old problems and issues, rather than redundant rhetoric and posturing pontification, followed by annual deferral and avoidance. The future is today, before our leaking population base shrinks even further. 

Think about it…

While not a huge proponent of lavish resolutions and laundry lists of ways to “improve” just because the clock strikes January 1, I do believe that steady self-awareness and conscious action can occur at any time, if only we would get just down to it. 

It’s 2024. Let’s not allow controllable situations and conundrums to tug on you too hard. A thought for 2024 might include lightening up on yourself (and others), even when things appear heaviest. Carrying the weight of the world makes for a sore back, which can be unpleasant, unwieldy, and destructive. So here are a handful of noteworthy quotes and sayings, with alleged attributions (some questionable in origin), to help you lighten up during unnerving times… 

“Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.” (Phyllis Diller)

“If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one.” (Andy Rooney)

“Friends are God’s way of apologizing to us for our families.” (Tennessee Williams)

“Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need most.” (American Proverb)

“You can’t believe everything you hear… but it’s fun to repeat it anyway.” (Milton Berle)

“Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain… and most do.” (Dale Carnegie)

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.” (Oscar Wilde)

“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.” (John Bright)

“We use 10% of our brains. Imagine how much we could accomplish if we used the other 60%.” (Ellen DeGeneres)

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe.” (Albert Einstein)

“Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.” (Oscar Wilde)

“Those people who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.” (Isaac Asimov)

“Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.” (Pauline Thompson)

“The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.” (George Carlin)

“I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.” (Noel Coward) 

“My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don’t really know me.” (Garry Shandling)

“When I was growing up, I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific.” (Lily Tomlin)

“People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.” (A.A. Milne/Winnie-The-Pooh)

It’s 2024. Breathe through your “knows”… 

Think about it…

No more over-sized trucks, orange cones, or pieces of asphalt causing door dings or chipped car windows. No more incessant beeping sounds of work vehicles backing up. No more single lane closures or upraised, metal plates covering persistent holes. Happy new year- Pali Highway repairs are (just about) finished! 

The planned three-mile, Vineyard to Waokanaka roadwork destruction/construction project has now taken six years (much longer than expected), with innumerous weather delays, underground impediments and unexpected findings, and who knows what else. Some areas (around Country Club Road and Queen Emma Summer Palace) seemed to get repaired, repaved… and then re-done repeatedly.

Mother Nature intervened often, not just with foul weather, but with landslides that created havoc; like in February, 2019, when rain-induced debris necessitated six-months of work to add an extension to and steel anchors above the town-bound, Kailua side tunnel. Travelers went from “poly”-tunnels to mono tunnel.

Two weeks ago, a trees/rocks/mud landslide occurred mere yards past the town-side tunnel exit, completely negating Honolulu-bound traffic for five days. Frankly, it’s a wonder we don’t see more downed trees, rocks, and dirt debris interrupting mountain-carved roadway excursions with frequent rainfall (and erosion) in so many places.

Take a look at trees and other foliage growing at even subtle angles the next time you travel alongside a steep hillside or mountain, and be thankful for deep tree roots (hopefully) and smart engineering plans. It makes you wonder, season after season, about erosion affecting trees, boulders, and/or earth and possible displacement. Also, when heavy rain meets dry, shallow ground, we can see more flash flooding. 

The 50,000+ (estimated) vehicles traversing the Pali Highway daily should now be able to travel more uneventfully in the years ahead. Speed bumps have been wisely added in more congested, residential areas between Wyllie and Waokanaka Streets to encourage amped drivers to simply obey existing speed laws.

The obvious upside of substantial winter rain? Much of the state is in some form of a drought condition, so precipitation, while persistent and sometimes ruinous for outdoor planning, provides relief for farmers and crops, and alleviates some concerns for potential fire zones. We cannot enjoy a cherished, lush, tropical Hawai`i without a certain regularity of precipitation.

And Windward drivers can celebrate January, 2024; the end of a patience-testing era as the final markings are affixed and stronger asphalt composition ensures more pleasant years of Pali travel ahead.

Think about it…

Holiday traditions are wonderful for many people. Anchoring, re-affirming, reminding many of a special place, time, tradition, family member(s), et al. Certain traditions are, of course, unique, or less commonplace among the masses. Today, let’s explore a few Christmas traditions and ask some semi-appropriate questions:

If egg nog and turkey stuffing are so good (which they are), why must we be resigned to such a short window of time to enjoy them? I mean, when was the last time someone invited you over for stuffed turkey and gravy in late May? Is there an unwritten law about over-eating outside of the Thanksgiving/Christmas holiday seasons?? And then there’s egg nog; a thick, tantalizing, sensory stimulating, fulfilling and filling beverage with a unique pizazz, yet it’s simply not seen on most store shelves for 10-months a year. Why? A quaff of the liquid gold wouldn’t be as fabulous on a hot July day?!

Here’s a holiday anomaly that’s fascinating. The #1 song on the national Billboard Hot 100 in early December was “Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree” by BrendaLee… a tune which made it’s first chart appearance when Brenda first recorded the ditty at age 13… in 1958! Yes, 65 years later, it’s finally topped the “current” chart of hot songs, one slot ahead of Mariah Carey’s (1994) “modern” Christmas classic, “All I Want For Christmas Is You”. Apparently, good things really do come to those who wait…

On the local tradition front, we ofttimes hear about fortunate Hawai`i contingents that are asked to play in the vaunted Rose Parade. This year, the Hawaii All State Marching Band, featuring 290 high school members assembled from Hawai`i’s four most populous islands, will be performing at the 135^th Rose Parade on January 1, 2024, playing local and Polynesian arrangements arranged by local musician, Siuai Laufou. Now that’s something worth celebrating annually!

…much like the Honolulu City Lights exhibition, the City’s Electric Light Parade, and the labor-of-love City Employee Tree Exhibition and Wreath Display. And let’s not forget Nāmoku Street in Kāne`ohe with the multi-home dazzling decorations that would give Chevy Chase’s illuminated abode in “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation” a run for its money.   

Lots of local and more mainstream traditions to (hopefully) put a smile on your face and a twinkle in your eye throughout this frantic holiday season. Enjoy the moments, laugh, and celebrate what you love. For ‘tis the season!

Think about it… 

The heavy rains of late-November/early December wreaked havoc underneath the state Capitol… again. While the area is undergoing repair (for problems first noted over 15 years ago), speculation continues about how best to replace or recreate the pools fronting the Capitol to highlight the original intent (1969) of a building (a very cool one, indeed) that represents a volcanic island, surrounded with palm trees aside the ocean.

As we’ve seen, the conceptual nature of this nature has been offset by the age-old reality of a leaky basin and too much time spent realizing the problem, but not fixing (or budgeting for) it. Thus, here are some whimsical, yet possible, alternatives to address our external Capitol concerns, amid the now-common views of plastic bags, dripping, and clean-ups.

Beach volleyball courts– what better way to celebrate the dynamic sport that Hawai`i considers its own in many ways! And what a great opportunity to drive more people to the structure than to have families and friends playing in the golden sand along Beretania Avenue. We could even charge hourly fees to help raise revenue!

Lawn bowling or bocce ball– though similar in nature, these two extremely fun games would again bring out the masses and provide for oodles of entertainment. Yes, we would have to keep the grass there somewhat immaculate, and that would mean watering in the same area where… oh well, maybe we can use a thick, synthetic, weather-resistant turf?!

Pickle ball courts– Come on, it’s the hottest sport out there right now, and how better to ensure that our local, orthopedic community has plenty of business going forward as baby boomers tweak ACLS and/or Achilles tendons as they literally jump into this craze. 

Model car racing– Leagues could be formed and encouraged to bring mini-racer teams to the track(s) on weekends when the kids aren’t scheduled for one of their 45 other activities.

Food truck rally/festival/park– perfect for downtown eaters looking for variety, stocked with a rotating cast of the incredible mobile eateries we now visit throughout O`ahu.

Cement barriers– as a not-so-subtle reminder about the concerns of global warming and its creeping impact on our environs.

A walking loop– why not simply turn this area into a walking trail ringing the Capitol? Include native plants aligned along the route with informative notations about plant life- exercise, socialization, nature and education all together- a Capitol idea!

Think about it…

‘Tis the season, for sure. For shopping, over-indulging, binge buying, traffic, nerve-fraying, jamming at work, and maybe… just maybe, a time for reflection. A look within as well as a broader look outside- might be a good thing. So since I’ve decided I can’t buy all of you a gift this year, I’m going to make a simple suggestion. Take five-minutes, just five, and listen to one, a few, or as many as you’d like of these songs in a quiet room with someone you love over the next three weeks. 

It might not set your world afire. It might not even be a song you like or know (that’s fine, you pick ‘em!). But no phones, no distractions, no barking dogs or kids; heck, you might even have to do this in a quiet car… but this reflection moment will only take five minutes. And surely you and your betrothed must be worth five minutes of personal time, yeh? To renew, to relive, to revisit? At such a special time of year.

We all know how much a part of this particular season music is. Prophetic, schmaltzy, perfect, your call. So take a chance amid the holiday madness to re-connect, sit quietly, listen, absorb, and perhaps even gaze at one another. No videos, no distractions. If it works for you, great; if not, it’ll cost you just five-minutes. Here’s a truncated list:

Lemme know how it works.

Think about it…

Seasonal songs for a fun-filled time of year. In a world perhaps overly sensitive and over-correcting (at times), here’s a twisted analysis of storied holiday songs, suggesting what some might consider to be titularly off-putting.

“All I Want For Christmas Is You”- Really? Must it always be about what you want! What about the collective us, or my needs? What about others?

“White Christmas”- Let’s not even go there…

“Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas”- Great! Now you get to dictate my feelings?

“Frosty The Snowman”- Come on… dude appears to have rhinophyma (really red nose) which social media suggests is linked to a, um, …drinking issue.

“The Little Drummer Boy”- how about just “the drummer boy”?! Why the pejorative term? 

“I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus”- uh-huh; is this another one of those so-called “open relationships”, or perhaps “just” a seasonal thing? Ho Ho Ho, indeed.

“Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer”- See “Frosty The Snowman”. And I hear that Santa knows!

“O Come All Ye Faithful”- Any chance we can extend this concept to 12-months annually? If we pull the caring card only on Christmas, are we absolved when acting rude or misbehaving the other 364 days?

“12 Days Of Christmas”- I heard that the numbers 13 and 14 filed an international lawsuit claiming date exclusion. Why limit such a gluttonous potpourri to just 12 days?

“Last Christmas”- Oh puh-leeease… can’t we just move on already? Why drudge up the past? I am sooooo over last Christmas. 

“Silent Night”- let’s make this concept acceptable more often- peace, quietude… no cellphones, video games, streaming, judgment, polarizing tribes, insincere pontification, or self-indulgent prattle?

“Santa Claus Is Coming To Town”- a bit presumptuous, isn’t it? And who declared you nice and not naughty? Was someone overseeing those votes? I detect voter fraud here.

“You’re A Mean One, Mr. Grinch”- Mean? Maybe he’s just got pent up emotional issues. How about some empathy? Hear him out. I mean, it is that most wonderful time of year, isn’t it?

“It’s The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year”- Who says? Here comes a polarizing, argumentative viewpoint from summertime fans, followed by those who cherish the changing autumn colors.

“Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer”- this smacks of ageism and recklessness; it just seems wrong and unfair on so many levels…

If nothing else, ‘tis the season to lighten up and light up (the house).

Think about it…

Do kids ever just “play” anymore? It seems that too many childhood activities nowadays must be carefully choreographed around school, parents’ work, multiple clubs or sports teams, such that kids rarely just go outside and play. That was de rigueur when many of us ancients grew up. And fun.

I recall great afternoon bicycle races with whomever was outside featuring laps around neighborhood driveways. It felt like the Indianapolis 500. And we’d play 2-on-2 or 3-on-3 football with whomever was around… until a mom yelled “dinner!” Normally we’d wait for said mom’s voice volume to ratchet up before we’d agree to finally call it a night.

Sure, some had after extracurricular teams or activities that required coordination, timing, carpooling, and choreographed time management. But it was done with restraint; seasons didn’t overlap endlessly into one another on overcrowded weekends. Nowadays, nine-year olds are rushed into game gear to try out for yet another all-star team so that just maybe, when they’re 18, they might earn a college athletics scholarship. And yes, I do lament the ridiculous costs of college (and private schools) these days.

Compounding this overscheduling problem locally, many kids within a neighborhood don’t go to the same school as others on their block. And if they play club sports, they’re off with yet a different group from even their normal school chums, so suggesting that kids just go out and play might require name tags within one’s own neighborhood.

I remember one of my kids telling me “I’m bored” when there wasn’t a scheduled weekend event… or four. Bored?  You don’t get to be bored when you’re 11! Go find something to do; play four square, tag, or hide and seek… safely. No phones!

Kids may enjoy their special clubs, teams, halau, tryouts, events, et al. But learning to act independently, sans supervision, teaches keiki, well… independence. Make games up, learn to adapt, create joy, and (hopefully) play fairly, or someone actually might take their ball and go home… a life lesson unto itself. But if there’s always a coach or parent right there to roll out another ball or yell instructions, might our fragile, over-indulged, chauffeured youth possibly become a little too programmed, automated, and/or dependent?

There’s nothing wrong with just playing. Try it. Go ask any psychologist or aggrieved, overworked, under-compensated, harried what’s-next parent. They would happily “just go play”. Any day… Happy Thanksgiving!

Think about it…