A little lightness and levity to kick off this merry, mirthy, mindful month:
Some suggest that things are going to the birds in many ways as obfuscation rules the world far too often, but Scotland saw a real case of things going off the rails when a swan held up train traffic for hours (during rush hour, of course) as it stood on the tracks in Glasgow five weeks ago. The disruption caused train delays and slowdowns. The bird was invariably moved out of harm’s way as ScotRail opined that the freeloader seemed “…a little distressed, but recovering well”. Perhaps, but thousands of Scots were in a fowl mood as the bird took his swan song before departing…
We all know that love hurts, but this one caught my eye… a Venezuelan tennis player who received a four-year suspension for testing positive for methamphetamine pleaded innocent, suggesting that the tainted result came from a simple (or not so simple) kiss. The burden of proof was on the player to prove the presence of the drug was unintentional, and he could not do so. Kiss and tell indeed. A French Olympic fencer actually did justify her innocence in a similar circumstance last year when she proved she’d been contaminated by an unwary bussing partner, giving a whole mean meaning to the term “kiss off”. Decapitalization/modernist poet e. e. cummings once wrote, “Kisses are a better fate than wisdom”. Sometimes, perhaps not…
And finally, last month a Detroit, Michigan, police officer remotely testified in a traffic-related case via Zoom. Most of us understand protocol and work expectations of “business” Zoom calls. We adapted quickly during the prolonged COVID era. Well, this law enforcement officer didn’t forget the case nor the facts; he simply forgot his pants. Yes, his home camera showed him appropriately attired from the shirt up, but revealed boxers below. The judge asked if the officer had pants on, and the forthright policeman copped to it with a quick “No, sir.” Busted.
The judge immediately admonished the officer. Detroit’s police department later noted that “the involved officer’s actions are not representative of the professionalism of this department and will be appropriately addressed…” So his lack of dress was to be appropriately addressed. One wonders if the unnerved traffic offender declared emotional duress during the call and asked for redress from the court?!
Holiday cheers!
Think about it…