Last year, there were seven (yes, seven) bills in play related to controlling O`ahu’s feral chicken population. Two bills that have rolled over into this year’s legislature propose a chicken complaint hotline… a phone number for people to call and squawk. That’s a real (chicken) nugget. Efforts to provide tainted feed to sterilize marauding cluckers were problematic, as the wild wanderers don’t hang around long enough to be contained and contaminated; they’re foragers. Plus, tossing infertility-laced feed is problematic for other animals.
Hmmm. what qualifies someone to professionally handle chicken complaints? Is there a pecking order? Traps are expensive, as are any removal suggestions, since freedom-seeking chickens apparently don’t want to comply. One concept- capture the bothersome birds and feed them to those in need- sounds interesting, but establishing a pleasant pheasant food facility is a logistical quagmire and a costly plan. California is trying rural relocation for city-dwelling chickens.
Unwieldy, expensive traps, persistent birth control feed, and coordinated culinary round-ups are not doing the job or not happening. With history as our guide, local legislators may cackle about bill specifics in committee, a few feathers will fly, and then we’ll be probably be back dissecting this issue in 2026.
The amiable, ancient philosopher, Yoda, said, “Do or do not. There is no try”. Except locally, where repeated attempts to get things done on perennial issues often wither with minimal resistance, invariably fading away ‘til next year, while elected officials suggest “we tried…” as they somehow hack their way through a mind-boggling 3,000+ proposed bills and the now-annual, last-sessions chaos.
Hawai`i legislators are rarely challenged in primary or general elections, so why rock the boat, create possible controversy, or chill feral chickens by making potentially provocative decisions? Our citizenry has been told to not feed wild chickens… will that prevent hungry hens from finding food elsewhere? As we now consider a cuckoo complaint line, what would this Office of Chicken Complaints actually do, besides relay concerns to higher-ranking administrators? Rampant, rambunctious chickens have been a local nuisance for years, much like illegal fireworks- and how’s that one going? Phone calls are probably not the answer.
Who rules this roost? Wild chickens mean unwanted, pre-dawn, wake up calls, can ruin yards, spread disease, and cause genuine road havoc. I don’t mean to sound like a bad egg here, but how about measurable action plans with a budget? Enough fowl play!
Think about it…