If it’s still alive and moving forward by the time this editorial appears, keep an eagle eye on Senate Bill 2195. When a ball is knocked out of play in a baseball game, it’s called a foul ball. If this resolution comes to fruition, it will be remembered as a much-needed fowl bill.
Many of us are aware of the indefatigable, independent chickens that show up everywhere nowadays. Slowing down or veering suddenly while driving to avoid them surely puts us in a fowl mood (sorry, but the puns will persist). Frankly, I find the sudden jerks left or right when I’m driving to be a bunch of chicken shift, but the details of SB 2195 could soon assuage our angst and minimize flying feathers.
Feral chickens would be fed (after EPA and DLNR approval) OvoControl, which is basically birdy birth control. It’s been used to diminish Waikiki’s prolific pigeon population, and now could help to kinda kindly control the unpleasant pheasants. OvoControl is considered humane, as birds who consume the mutated morsels will simply produce infertile eggs. This process will take time, and Senate Bill 2195 provides for a five-year plan, so you’ll have to continue to count your chickens before they don’t hatch. And if this works? “Winner, winner, chicken thinner!” will be the cry, as introduced OvoControl scrambles eggs.
SB 2195 requires that annual updates be provided to the legislature (eggs-aminations?), and hopefully we’ll view these findings as “chicken nuggets”. But that all depends on this OvoControl overture. If the chicken scratch works as well as the birth control pigeonholing did a few years back, perhaps we’ll someday look back fondly at the watershed 2022 legislature for (hopefully) finalizing funding on big issues (an increase in minimum wages, more so-called tiny homes and public land usage for truly affordable housing, more housing allowances, et al.), while at the same time meeting grand egg-spectations on feral chicken reduction.
The planned pilot poultry prevention program would start this summer in the Aiea/Pearl City area, and then spread, like the purposely tainted feed. OvoControl usage will need to be overseen (as best as it can be) to prevent other avians from pilfering polluted pellets, but handling this problem in such a humane way could be a real shot in the arm (oops, sore subject… literally) with fewer wayward chickens crossing our roads and coming home to roost.
Think about it…