MidWeek Column

Remember one year ago? So much momentum for so many, with so many clever ads and promos pushing how we’re entering 2020 with open eyes and great focus, you know- “20/20” vision, that type of thing?

Well, things a got quite blurry in 1^st quarter, and then it got worse. So here we are, entering 2021 with cautious optimism, a heavy dose of realism based on facts, and the absolute need to get things back on track. When crisis entities and elected officials here historically discussed what possible cataclysmic events might affect us, the major impact items were usually nature-related: earthquakes, tsunamis, volcanoes, and hurricanes. And while each of these could be devastating, you could plan how to immediately handle the clean-up, fallout, loss of power, all- hands-on-deck recovery, and more. You’d start to bounce back within days.

But this insidious, take-no-prisoners virus didn’t come and go like a natural disaster or even a seasonal flu. It lingered, or rather, it lingers. It didn’t pick one area in which to do damage; it used evil, airborne messengers to transmit nasty effects islands-wide and worldwide, disproportionately affecting those least able to fight it. 

We say “good riddance” to 2020, yet know that COVID-19 doesn’t abide by calendars or our personal resolutions to start anew just because 2021 starts Friday. Even with a plethora of vaccinations administered over the coming months, we still must adhere to distancing, mask-wearing, and repeatedly cleaning our hands. 

As we’ve learned (sometimes painfully), letting one’s guard down for even a brief moment can prove to be enough to allow this unwelcome, microscopic, invisible, hovering guest into our lives. “Trust” is not enough when loved ones or friends live outside of your insulated bubble, as you must protect yourself and your inner circle from the novel coronavirus. Paranoia? No, reality.

One thing that’s probably improved over the past year is your vocabulary- with now-commonplace terms and concepts imprinted: novel coronavirus, super-spreader, herd immunity, asymptomatic, contact tracing, flattening the curve, epidemiology, pandemic, PPE, PPE, self-quarantine, N95, social distancing, and ventilators. It’s exhausting to think of what we now have to think of!

But enter 2021 we shall, gosh darn it; we will prevail, because that’s what we do. We may be exhausted, nervous, frustrated, and optimistically looking ahead, but caution amid recovery is essential to shake the persistent grip of this most unkind and unrelenting enemy. Onward!

Think about it…    

We come to that time of the year when we reflect on what we’ve accomplished this year, what needs to be done next year, where we’re going, what we’re feeling, et al. We acknowledge loved ones and valued acquaintances through notes, emails, texts, calls, cards, or gifts, connecting- while separated- with those people who truly make a difference in our lives.

Obviously, this twisted, confining, and confounding year seems different at Christmastime and as we head into 2021. So much has been unique and surreal in 2020, a year like never before. Forced isolation, strange new rules for behavior and decorum, abandoned practices and rituals. At times it felt like this can’t really be happening. But we’ve adapted, dealing with our nightmare version of “Groundhog Day”. A better future is in sight, finally.

So in three years, when you reflect back on 2020 (and at least the first part of 2021), how will you say you handled it all? For those of means, will you say that you made a positive difference? Did you contribute through your actions, efforts, and/or giving? It’s not too late to make an impact, whether through monetary donations, giving of your time, or even via virtual volunteering?

Check out this volunteer website: http://www.hiho.org/, or call one of the thousands of local non-profits and simply ask, “What can I do?” Contributing to local cultural organizations through their virtual events can lift your spirits via quality entertainment as you provide much-needed revenue for our struggling local arts and artists. There are all kinds of ways to give or give back. 

If your thoughts all along have been to hunker down until things get back to “normal”, you might be disappointed come 2022 when some of your favorite retailers and restaurants have simply ceased to be. Giving back to your community now, even remotely, might be the best way to allow you to someday reflect back at this bleak blip in time and feel good about having done some good.

So many locally are just trying to survive this on-going confusion. If you have the means, energy, time, soul, empathy, creativity, and/or funds, now is a great time to take action. When you reflect on the saga of this COVID-19 era, you’ll know that you didn’t just survive it or watch idly, but you actually made a difference. It’s not too late to just do that, starting tomorrow.

Think about it…

In a year where we need more feel-good stories, a recurring character connected to the Hawaiian archipelago just popped up again to make us smile. Her name is Wisdom; she’s a Laysan albatross who returns every couple of years to Midway Atoll. But this bird of a different feather doesn’t just show up to soak up some rays and nosh on fish eggs; no, no. 

Wisdom’s homecoming a couple of weeks ago was heart-warming, as she’s now hatched over 35 chicks in her seven decades of life. Biologists have proof that Wisdom is at least 69 years old! Crustaceans for everyone! The Honolulu Star-Advertiser recently updated us, and this bird is an inspiration to humans and perhaps to the millions of other albatrosses that call Midway Atoll home. Wisdom was first banded as an adult in 1956. She and mate Akeakamai have been together since at least 2010, but rumor has it that they first got together when Wisdom recorded her hit, “Roe, Roe, Roe Your Boat” back in the 1990s. In this season that celebrates birth, Wisdom is something of a miracle.

Akeakamai, which means “philosopher” or “lover of wisdom” (get it?) is obviously no bird brain, as he accompanies his beloved mate trip after trip. Yes, they’re frequent fliers. They take turns nurturing newborns, with the non-nester flying off to hunt for food.

The Laysan albatross is one of 22 albatross species and is considered to be an incredibly efficient traveler. They take long flights over the ocean, expending little energy- maybe like far too many of us who’ve been inactive on weekends since the onset of intermittent COVID-19 quarantines. 

National Geographic called Wisdom the “oldest confirmed wild bird and the oldest banded bird in the world”, but she stays young through her consistent Midway treks back to give birth. Human grandparents at age 69 never have to say they’re sorry, but rather, “here, you can take junior back now, I’m done playing…” when visiting their kids. And yet here’s Wisdom, popping ‘em out with her innate intelligence and remarkable fertility. Wisdom just might change that age-old stereotype about something or someone being an “albatross around your neck”. She’s a symbol of hope, a sage of survival, a wizard of will, and the plucky persona of perseverance. She is shattering stereotypes, a valuable lesson to anyone seeking a dynamic New Year’s resolution.

Think about it…

Sometimes it’s little things we take for granted which mean so much. In a season loaded with thanks, praise, ecards, reflections, and gifts, it’s time to praise the ones we don’t consciously think about often enough, but who really do make a difference.

Like Kit, who always smiles with sincere appreciation whenever she sees me waiting at her fast food, drive-through window. I know, it’s just a burger, but she always asks me how I’m doing and really wants me to have a good day. How can you not drive away feeling better?!

Or Keith, who drops off the newspapers every morning with little fanfare in pristine condition, rain or shine, housed in their sleek, plastic bag. If something is amiss (infrequently), I comment online, he calls me within 15-minutes, and the missing periodical appears within 30-minutes. Amazing. I’m soothed. Again, the little things…

Or Beau, who every couple of years whitewashes our mildewy roof. He confirms a price, shows up on time, cleans up well, and smiles in appreciation with his passion to do things right. Quality people who take the concept of “just doing their job” and turn it into an art form, more than a perfunctory routine, a grind, or a chore. It’s so pleasant to work with people who are so pleasant.

Like David, who would come in after business hours to clean our offices for decades, always asking how things were going, always with genuine interest, asking if anything needed extra polishing, waxing, cleaning, or care. Just because.

Or Brett, who ensures that the office furniture looks right and fits right. And Nick, who treats placing a golf bag on a golf cart like surgery- carefully, with focus, and as if it was his own… so you smile as you drive away.

I could ramble on about many more people who we all encounter in our regular orbits. We usually don’t know them well, yet they provide comfort through consistent caring and conscientiousness attitudes. We leave their presence feeling better than when we showed up. Yes, a big mahalo this holiday season to those who make that difference (especially in these tough times) by living aloha, even if our interactions with you are brief and infrequent. Quality service is (unfortunately) not a given, but you folks provide a wee spark to uplift us, free of charge. Merry Christmas!

Think about it…

I heard a cool song that I’d never heard the other day during a TV commercial. So, I got up, rewound the DVR to replay the ad, then used my Shazam cell phone app to identify the name of the song, went to Spotify, copied the URL of the song and sent it to my email for later listening and consideration on my annual “top songs of the year” list. Gratifying…

So many things going on there that even a semi-Luddite could I appreciate- rewind capability, mobile apps, easy access, email, etc. Years ago, I would have had to remember that tune and hopefully figure it’s title later. The point here is that in this nightmarish year, now’s a great time to reflect on things you’re thankful for beyond the sometimes-taken-for-granted-but-shouldn’t-be joys of life (family, health, friends, a job). Imagine what school would be like in a pandemic world without distance learning. Yeh, it’s flawed, but it’s manageable. Imagine how office work would have been handled in 2020 without those now-overdone Zoom calls.

How would we have connected with loved ones without wireless devices and virtual, visual get-togethers? Of course it’s not as good as actually being there, but it sure beats total absence. So here’s to digitalia allowing us to stay in touch and be touched when we can’t touch. No one covets COVID, but we’ve survived with the aid of tech tools as we bemoan our relative isolation, week after week.

Let’s be thankful in a viral year to live where we can comfortably spend time outdoors from November to March, while much of the nation shivers- forced to be inside… a lot. Here’s to local food merchants making the best of this pandemic with delivery, curbside service, pop-up locations, and can-do attitudes. And first responders- you rule.

Thanks for monetary help provided to people in need from family, friends, neighbors, programs, and forgiving lenders. Thanks for the creative spirit to help the downtrodden see a distant light at the end of this viral tunnel, when things will return to a new sense of normal, when the term “going viral” won’t trigger thoughts of catastrophe.

Yes, this season of giving thanks provides us with time to reflect, remember, and realize that while 2020 has been ugly in oh so many ways, if we search, there are always things we can smile about and be appreciative of.

Think about it… 

While the numbers are still being sorted out, one thing about the 2020 election is for certain. Hawai`i voters came out (or mailed in) in huge numbers. We relinquished our position of being the most apathetic state in the country (when it comes to voting). “Ainokea” was replaced by “AiDOkea” as our voting ranks swelled to about 70% of all registered voters, a huge jump from the decades of weaker local election turnout. Our total vote count of about 580,000 was 27% higher than when Hawaii’s own Barack Obama first ran for the country’s top office back in 2008.

A full two-thirds of all local ballots were handled through the mail- simple, easy, convenient, and precedent-setting. Well, precedent-setting locally, but Union soldiers ramped up our country’s mail-in voting process way back in 1864 (they were a bit busy in the field, as you might imagine). Most states allowed soldiers to vote from afar during World War I, when the practice really took hold nationally. Bottom line- absentee voting is a centuries-old tradition in America. Oregon has been exclusively a vote-by-mail state since 2000, and Hawai`i now also joins Colorado, Washington, and Utah as vote-by-mail states. Yes, both red and blue areas do it without rancor in a purple world…

Some persist that there must be some gamesmanship (or worse) going on. According to TIME magazine, in the election year of 2016, “Despite claims of vote fraud when voting is conducted outside of polling places, only 0.00006% of the 250 million votes by mailed ballots nationwide were fraudulent, according to MIT political scientists who analyzed numbers from the Heritage Foundation’s Election Fraud Database.”  Thus, there were about 150 dubious votes cast out of 250,000,000 in 2016. Even in a skewed, jaded, divided, sometimes post-truth world, statistics can be revealing.

Emotions and stakes seemed higher this year, helping to drive up voting numbers, but the good news is that more people in 2020 participated in our hallowed hallmark of democracy rather than choosing to abstain and then whine. Numerous closely contested races suggest that every vote does matter- a truism in every election. 

COVID-19 concerns made absentee voting easier to rationalize and a safer option for many, and the bottom line is that Hawai`i overcame its historically apathetic approach in experiencing the biggest percentage growth of voters of any state. Here’s hoping that spirit becomes a long-term habit.

Think about it…

It might be a little bit tougher for some this year for oodles of really good reasons, but the season to give thanks is nigh upon us as we hit mid-November. And while this may be a holiday season unlike any other in memory, our calendars dictate that special times are right around the corner. I’ve often pondered why we can’t just be nicer 12-months a year, instead of at Thanksgiving and Christmas time. Do we really need a calendar to tell us to treat people more kindly, or be more cheerful and thankful? After all, if we do it now, can’t we do it later, too?

Are those human traits such a stretch that we can’t take the wonderfulness of this season and stretch it out? Stores hold “Christmas in June” sales, so why can’t more people celebrate with Christmas attitudes that last beyond this 45-day window through News Year’s Day? Of course we can. We can ratchet our empathy levels up a notch regularly. We can sincerely thank people for the things they do and the things they mean to us more regularly.

Praising people you work with, jog with, or live with need not be exclusive November and December events. April’s a great month to be more consciously competent. July’s a hot time to give someone a gift card. October’s a cool month to be more aware of friends, family, co-workers, and neighbors. With some people, it almost feels forced when they turn on the charm for just a month or so around winter holidays. But, at least we know they’ve got it in ‘em!

And by the way, if eggnog is so good (which it is) why don’t we drink it year round? It’s kinda like the occasional McRib tease- only showing up on rare occasions. Why? And can’t we stuff turkeys and slather on the cranberry sauce in February? I’m pretty sure there’s no local ordinance against that endeavor. Let’s become creatures of helping, and not so much creatures of habit. Eat, drink, and be merry whenever. And let’s also pile on the sincere caring, volunteering, donating, giving, and listening so badly needed 12-months a year.  Yeh, it’s been a tough 2020. But let’s not Scrooge it up by losing sight of our faith in humanity, ourselves, and the reality that we will get to the other side of this debacle.

Think about it…

A cohort of mine once philosophized: “don’t worry about things over which you have no control”. A simple adage perhaps, but also quite profound. For how many nights of sleep have we all lost pondering COVID-19-related situations that might adversely affect us, but over which we felt we had little, direct control?

It’s easy to say these words but oh, so hard to live up to them. There is empirical truth in the concept, especially as we all deal with our own versions of the pandemic blues in month #9. Rather than dwell on worst-case scenarios, find a plausible reality you can influence and deal with. Rather than contemplate the “what ifs”, start problem-solving (if you haven’t already). Yeh, the coronavirus conundrum involves uncertainties, unpleasantries, and possibly some major (or minor) life changes. But better to be the planner than merely the recipient of what fate throws at you, isn’t it?

Find healthy alternatives to binge-watching, web-wasting, and texting; swerve away from over-eating or drinking. Obviously, these would’ve been healthy month #3 plans, but it’s never too late. Take a drive somewhere you wouldn’t normally go- change the scenery. Go for a walk- in a different direction. Eat kale! Explore new music, or seek out old music you never dove into. Go wild- combine walking or driving with good music. How bold! Set you mind free, even occasionally. Escape the humdrum and numbness. 

Break your routines down. Brush your teeth right after dinner, a subtle signal to your brain that you’re pau for the night (which might reduce snacking and/or cravings). Contact someone you haven’t seen in years- but don’t play 2020’s “misery loves company” game; instead, find common bonds that made this lapsed contact a one-time ally; laugh about good days as you reminisce. Re-train your brain.

We all have interwoven connections from many facets of our lives here locally. Change your outlook via a little change in your direction and attitude. While nothing will currently prevent this oppressive, viral moment from being a monotonous drag and drain, you DO control your outlook, demeanor, and valuation of all people and all things. Give yourself a break, for you surely deserve it. I wrote this a week before the long-awaited election results started to funnel in, but guess what- at the end of each and every day, you still control you. You may take charge.

Think about it…

Being officially quarantined for two weeks is no picnic, but often it’s the little things in life that help you get by. As we sat numb through day three, four, and then five, my akamai nephew and his equally wonderful wife dropped off small gifts with big implications. Sometimes, the seemingly insignificant can keep us grounded, hopeful, and present. Sometimes, that which seems trivial can be a perfect solution.

And so it was when they dropped off Ding Dongs and Ho Hos. Defined as “small, cylindrical, frosted, cream-filled chocolate snack cakes with a pinwheel design”, Ho Hos are so much more. A timeline that reverberates deep within my very being. After scarfing down a Mom-crafted, lunchtime sandwich in junior high school, Ho Hos were an indulgent, dessert treat. And unlike those other delightful offerings (Twinkies, Sno balls, Ding Dongs) Ho Hos came three to a pack!

Yeh, perhaps the questionable Vaseline-like texture of Ho Hos preclude their stature atop the food pyramid… but come on. There’s soul food, and then there’s food for the soul. And we can all use some nostalgic padding nowadays to help us through the hellish harshness of 2020, right!

As I ate the savory, chocolate offering, I also reflected on my 15-years of AYSO coaching, when the big deal on Saturdays was not reflecting on a win or a loss, but rather- what’s for snack?! I often opted for Ho Hos or Ding Dongs. The simple onomatopoeia when I said “Ho Hos” or “Ding Dongs” was usually enough to get my minions laughing out loud. And then I would add, “Ding Dongs… because you guys (girls) are a bunch of ding dongs!”- a sure crowd pleaser.

Whether it’s shave ice, ahi poke, gazing out at your favorite beach while reminiscing about body surfing ‘til sunset, it’s OK to immerse yourself in nostalgia and trivia; exercise the vast recesses of your now-adult mind. When I hear The Beatles’ “Yesterday” (the most covered pop song of all-time), I’m back in 4^th grade, wishing Liz Nathan would pay more attention to me and less to my pals- Joey and Larry. Alas, it wasn’t to be.

We need more safe escapes today, perhaps more than ever, and you house some of them within your mind. Ho Hos take me back to gentler times- 25  or even 55 years ago- and when I return, I’m convinced that it’s really gonna be OK.

Think about it…